May 19th to 28th is Canadian Infertility Awareness Week. To quote the Infertility Awareness Association of Canada website: "1 in 6 Canadian couples, of childbearing age, struggle to conceive. Infertility affects thousands of women and men across our country. It is a medical condition that can leave us feeling isolated, confused, heartbroken and helpless. Through IAAC’s #1in6 campaign, we aim to empower patients to speak out about their lived infertility experiences and to educate the public about taking control of their own fertility." We are 1 in 6. I would like to acknowledge all the people who have supported and continue to support our family, as well as our friends, family and colleagues who are struggling to build their families (1 in 6 means someone you know). To learn more, visit http://www.iaac.ca/en . I will also post some other articles and information in the comments section below as the spirit moves me.
So what happened? Not a lot, really. There were a few "likes" and a comment from a fellow blogger who is connected to me on Fa.cebook. The post didn't get anywhere near the attention that my posts about the baby get, or even the random silly observations I usually make. A typical Fa.cebook post from me: "I really like that feeling when I get ALL the laundry done and there are no dirty clothes in the house at all! (yes my life is exciting and I like it that way. :D)" People can relate to that kind of crap. Infertility, meh. Admittedly, as my fellow blogger pointed out, the "confession" part of the post was somewhat buried, so people might not have read that far or even made the personal connection. I'm sure my post could have had more impact if I'd included "human interest" content, but even though I drafted a few that were more personal, I couldn't bring myself to more vulnerable.
On the other hand, there weren't any inappropriate inquiries or comments, either. It remains to be seen if I will still get "so when are you having the next one?" comments. :-) As I stated before, I would be quite happy if my post does nothing but shut those down.
My conclusion? Fa.cebook is still for silly stuff, torthúil is for serious stuff (when I want to be serious). But I don't regret making the post. The picture and the text is also sitting in my small Facebook family album, and I've no intention of removing it, so anyone who looks through the album will encounter it as part of our story.
Having the luxury of very few filters on torthúil, I can say without hesitation that living with/through infertility and subfertility has affected who I am. In some ways it has brought out my negative and self-centred side. I cringe at pregnancy announcements, especially - now - second pregnancy announcements. For example, I'm resentful every time I hear about a certain Royal Family's two children, or the fact that the Duch.ess can pop two babies in two years (or something), all the while showing off a perfect body and wardrobe, while everybody oohs and aahs over the fact she has a functioning reproductive system. Bitter and jealous? Definitely. I'm not proud of those emotions, but I don't fight them either; I try to just accept and then ignore them/move on/not feed the Grinch. On the other hand, I've learned so much from following many people in the blog community. It has been an education of the heart and mind. I would like to think I'm a more thoughtful and compassionate person because of it. And I'm endlessly humbled by the encouragement and compassion others have given me, especially those who have been through immeasurable heartache.