Wednesday 31 December 2014

New Year's Eve

Mel posted about New Year's Resolutions in her Microblog Monday post. When I went to reply, I thought there are so many things I could write about, including any of the new things on my mind that I wrote about earlier this week.  Then I realized that when it comes to resolutions, there's really only one thing I will resolve to do, and that's to not constantly look back to "this time last year" in 2015. 2014 was an eventful year. There was a lot about this year that was joyful and wonderful. There was also some stuff that was traumatic, and I really don't want to spend more time living it over and over in my mind. Especially January and February.

But today I find myself feeling a bit emotional because it is the last day of the year AJ was born. It will never be the year of her birth again. She will look back on 2014 as the beginning of time, at least of her time.  I feel a bit regretful that she wasn't born earlier in the year so we could have lived in the year of her birth longer.

And there is something awesome about realizing that whatever 2014 was.....well, it was. It's in the past tense. Some times it's hard to leave experiences in the past, either because they were awful and they have made me afraid, or because they were wonderful and I don't want to let them go. But now on New Year's Eve, I feel like I'm free to see 2014 in a new light. The story has been told. It can be re-told and re-interpreted, but whatever happened, cannot be changed or undone. And that's somehow liberating.

At the same time I recall Caroline's post about how year ends and beginnings are really an illusion. We decided as humans that we would mark time in years, but maybe there is a better way of marking time.

AJ has come up with some totally different coos and cries today. Her daily growth and development is a reminder that life is happens in motion. And if 2014 was her year, so will be the future years.  She's also figuring out how to get her thumb into her mouth and keep it there long enough to suck. Maybe thumb sucking is not a good habit,  but she perseveres so much, it's really touching. And she is so sad when it falls out again and she loses it, and cries like the world is such a terrible unjust place. OK that was a bit random.

Happy New Year everyone. Thanks for walking with me this year. It means so much. I hope so much that 2015 brings everyone closer to their dreams, or even brings new dreams into your path.

15 comments:

  1. Happy birthday friend!!! Cheers to a wonderful 2015!!! xoxo

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  2. PS clearly it's past my bedtime, haha, Happy NEW YEARS not birthday! haha

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    1. No worries, it was my birthday on 26th of December hahaha

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  3. PPS are you sick of me yet? oh my, i'm a mess! Thanks for the shoutout/tag!

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  4. Thanks for sharing your journey with us this year. I hope 2015 is all that you hope for

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  5. I thought it was so adorable when Hazy found her thumb! She would stick her index and middle fingers on either side of her nose when she did it...so cute! I hear you on wanting 2014 to stick around a little longer....It was probably the happiest year of my life! I am betting 2015 will be just as sweet though :)

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    1. Thank you! hoping for much more happiness ahead for all of us!

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  6. Cheers to you and AJ and the lifetime ahead. It's been wonderful following her journey into existence!! Also, thumb sucking is perfectly fine, I promise. It's a good way to self-soothe and won't give her crooked teeth like people say.

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    1. thank you! Yeah, we're not going to worry about her thumb sucking, at least not at this point, lol. I don't know how we'd stop her from doing it even if we tried. Anyway, soon everything is going to be going into her mouth.

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  7. Happy New Year! I can't believe the birth year of our babies is over. We have been sick around here, but are feeling better and it's going to be a good year!

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    1. glad you are feeling better! the 3 of us have come down with a cold (not a really bad one so far). Being sick is a pain. All the best for 2015

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